So long family

Yeah, so I ordered Fallout 3 and Oblivion. I didn't mean to do the Bethesda theme, but I did. Hopefully the games and my XBox will be arriving about the same time.

Reckoning Day, Reckoning Night

Ah, the last few hours of the weekend. It's almost worth giving up a paycheck to just not feel the crushing weight of it. The fact that it was an enjoyable weekend makes it even more difficult to go back to work. Luckily, we have the first off, so it's broken up into three and one. I'd rather it be just a long weekend, but whatever.

I said something unfair and untrue to Amanda today.

I got a generic gift-card from my in-laws and the thrill of capitalism is upon me. After so many months of being a financial black hole, this sudden influx of funds from gifts and my first paycheck, however small, from my job has made me almost giddy. Now I just need to settle on what I want to buy with the $100 I have. I could go the board game route. There are two expansions to Arkham Horror I don't have yet and they would get me caught up there and take the game into a world of WTF I have never seen. It would also push the total retail for the core game and the expansions past the $200 mark, which makes me giggle a bit. I paid about $80 for Twilight Imperium, which was totally worth it. Then Bahie bought the expansion and then I sold the whole thing to Nate for $30 and a 4th Edition D&D handbook. I'm not sure if Bahie got screwed there... but I feel he did. I don't know.

OR! I could go the video game route. I have several options here: Left 4 Dead would be a good choice considering the over two years of XBox Live Gold I got. Fallout 3 would be another choice and a possible child neglect charge. I'm also considering a few months of City of Heroes, but that would require commitment from Bahie, Dave, and possibly Amanda for me to really, really want to do that.

"But J.R.," you may say. "What about Miranda? You could buy something for her." I offer exibit A, my living room floor, which is awash in various whatsits and such and say, "Nay!"

Seriously, she's fine. Lot's of stuff.

We also bought her a pile of clothes from the GoodWill to replace her ever dwindling does-this-still-fit pile.

If it falls on you, we're just going to bury you out here.

So, if there's one thing I'm jealous of, it's my buddy Andy's blog. Reading his made me want to start my own. The thing is, though, is that his entries really show his education and knowledge of philosophy really shines through. He can easy and entertainingly pull back the skin of things and show the fun gooey stuff underneath. I get caught in the skin most times and I try to make sense of the interior of the structure by how the outside looks. Then I just fake it till I make it. The single thing that got me through just about every paper I wrote in college is that I never doubted whatever it was that I was trying to say, regardless of how much or how little proof I had or if I even believed what I was saying.

It's been four months or so since I had my last hair cut. I intend to get a trim in the next week or so, but I'm thinking about how much to get taken off. Should I grow it out? I've got to say, while I'm used to it short now as it's almost been two years, but if I entered The Matrix my hair would be long.

I've started carrying a little notebook in order to jot down my thoughts so that they don't disappear into the little ether where all my random thoughts go. I mean they will. I can't write down an actual thought, but I can put a thread on it to pull it back in or find it later.

But it's late and I'm tired. My mom is home from the hospital, and it's wonderful.

You're the best, daddy.

I'm not sure how a majority of people keep friendships going without games. Most of the people I consider friends I met over a game of some sort (the rest I met in college, but have played a game with at some point). My relationships with Bahie, Nate, Marcus, and Dave were all forged through Dungeons and Dragons. Andy and Paul I got to know with board games (and video games). Leslie and Carrie I know from college, but have played Werewolf and board games with Leslie, and board games with Carrie. Shea and I met at work and started talking about video games and now he plays Shadowrun at my place Monday nights.

Additionally, I don't know what other friends do when they hang out together, especially as one's age goes up and the pull of responsibility makes just "hanging out" a less attractive option. Once a board game hits the table, or game night rolls around, then it's active leisure, not just wasting time. We were storming a corporate front trying to save the client till 2 am; which is different than just screwing around with your buddies. I think that's why social drinking exists, and why I don't usually imbibe. It's hard to hold your shit together in a game of Settlers, say, if you're several gin and tonics down.

Now, that's not to say that I haven't used games as facilitators to drinking. Last Night on Earth has been used in such a way, but Liar's Dice has got to by my favorite. After three shots, the dice and pips and numbers swim in your mind like a school of fish and you become more bold and brazen in your bluffs, calls and accusations. Then the game comfortably and naturally dissipates when everyone has had enough. It's also alot easier to follow than spades for new players. Fucking spades. Stupid game.

So people drink, I believe, in general, forthwith, to facilitate socializing. Games do the same. It gives everyone involved something to talk about, but it's not all we talk about. We talk about work, and relationships, and what we're watching on TV. But it fills the voids and works as a jumping off point for conversation. I guess other hobbies can be used in the same way, but few are as social as gaming, which makes me wonder at the stereotype of gamers as anti-social or loners. I mean, some are and they are a sad, sad lot, but the nature of the hobby requires you to have at least a few people who can stand you for a while.

This must be the Swamp of Stinkiness.

Went to orientation today. Standard stuff. Don't be late, don't steal and sell privileged information on the black market, etc. But it's a business casual environment and they have a full cafeteria with a salad bar and free coffee.

So tomorrow starts training and Monday I'm on the phones.

How are we going to do that Kai-Lan?

Amanda and I took Miranda to get her Christmas portraits done this morning. Despite having been woken up from a nap and being in unfimiliar environs and being jostled this way and that by a complete stranger she was a real trooper and some real gems came out of the session. Additionally, the total for the portraits came out to less that$5o with a fancy coupon from their website.

We then went to IHOP and I got a Bacon Temptation Omelet... I am forever tempted by bacon, and IHOP had the panache to call me on it. I also had three glasses of iced coffee because it's so fucking good.

I've been playing a "free" FPS called Combat Arms on my PC. First and foremost it falls under my blanket belief that RPG elements make anything better. For example, I enjoy parenting and being a parent, but I can't say I don't feel the lack of a defined leveling system, or balanced character classes. To be fair, Miranda simply doesn't have the hit points to last in combat. Not to say that I want or need her to tank for me, but I'd rather not have to rez her every 15minutes either.

So, Combat Arms should be an excellent diversion and sometimes it is. The problem is is that glitches, exploits, and hacks run rampant so the guy in the lead is more likely to be using a hack of the game than using legitimate skills. On the other hand, it's really hard to give good players thier props because you don't know if they're legit. It's sad and more than a little irritating. But I can gain experience and points to purchase weapons and modification therefore.

I've finally got a character into the 70s in Diablo 2. I can't tell you when that last time that happened. Everyone should be playing it. Seriously.

Bahie, Shea and I got in a game of Arkham Horror last night, which went better than we forsaw, which is an easy statement to make about any game of AH. We had 3 of the 6 gate goal sealed, and were doing well as far as clue collection. But we just couldn't stay on top of the monsters on the board and the King in Yellow just made a quickly woken Shudde'Mel awaken even faster. Luckily Bahie finished a task making the Great Old One weaker in combat and we were just equipped enough to make a strong showing in the battle and we got the win, saving Arkham from being destroyed by a terrible earthquake.

If none of that made any sense to you, then you need to drop me a line and we'll get our game on. In a proper way of course.

I'm still waiting for my Xbox. It just got to TX to be repaired on the 13th. It'll probably be New Years before I see it again.

And on the tenth day, J.R. said "Oh, yeah. I've got a blog"

So, my mom comes home in less than a week. Next Friday. She hasn't been home since October 5th. That's over two months. How long have you ever been away from home?

She spoke to a woman named Elizabeth, who is a paramedic who stopped and helped my mom after the accident. She was off-duty at the time and was driving just behind them when it happened. She told them two pieces of information: 1) There was no way to avoid the deer. It just jumped right out at them and 2) That my mom wasn't thrown from the bike. She held on as it flipped and it ultimately landed on her. So now she's moved from "There was nothing I could have done" to "I should have let go of the bike". And since responsibility breeds guilt, she's been pretty angry at herself for a few days. There is so much healing they have to do.

It satisfies my soul...

So, I've got a job that will span from Dec. 17 to Jan. 16. Answering phones. Three years at Wesleyan paying off. My father tells me that I need to get "hungry for it". I'm not sure I know what he means nor what he's implying. I guess what it comes down to is that I simply don't know what to do. My resume' is at a place that I think it adequately conveys what I've done and what I can do. Additionally, doing more to pad my resume' further would involve classes and certifications that I simply cannot pay for. The image I have of an employer looking at my resume' has them turning it this way and that as if trying to make sense of a language that is almost there own, then giving up and tossing it.

On the upside, Miranda is on a precipice. Her gross motor skills are improving. She has a drive to walk, but just needs that extra umph to use it as a primary mode of transportation. She can move quite well if she has something to support her and has taken numerous steps unassisted, but she just can't quite keep her hips centered. Additionally, her vocal skills are taking off. She "bah, bah, bahs" quite well, and is beginning to add "da, da, da" to her vocabulary. She also vocalizes at the dogs barking and does a "Huh" or "Hai" sound at uncannily appropriate times.

She also enjoys just sitting next to her toy box pulling stuff out, inspecting it, then discarding it and moving onto the next thing. It's very sweet to watch.